How Yoni Steaming Healed Me from Sexual Assault and Propelled Me Onto a Path of Healing Others

If you would have told me in my teens or even college that I would be engrossed in the spiritual community, helping womb-en reclaim their sacred sexual power, unleash their divine feminine magic, unshackle themselves from trauma, and heal their yoni’s holistically, I would have laughed right in your face! So how did I become the Yoni Priestess? Well at first, I would have said it all began in late 2015, early 2016, but really this story started the day I was born. Since my earthside journey began 28 years ago on a cold December day, I have always had an innate capability to connect, to heal, and to lift those who were suffering around me. Fast forward through my parent’s divorce, my father’s marriage to my stepmother, the birth of my twin half siblings, my mother’s tumultuous relationship, and the start of my brother’s long battle with addiction- I was a newfound freshman in college just starting out on her own in the world, thousands of miles from home. That freshman year changed me forever- nearing the end of the first semester I was sexually assaulted. As a perfectionist struggling to always be the “good girl”, this was a ghastly grotesque mark on my otherwise flawless “resume”. I felt ashamed, disgusted, broken, dirty, worthless, disconnected, and embarrassed. How could I let this happen to me? How could I still carry on as the perfect girl with a wicked scar like this one? How could I bury the ugly to try and minimize any fallout? The answer…shove it down so deep inside that no one would suspect a thing. Take the anti-depressants and Xanax and maybe it will all just go away. After about a year the cracks started to really show. I hit 200 pounds before sliding into an eating disorder, the panic attacks were frequent, I distanced myself from close friends, floundered in a codependent relationship, I hated myself and who I saw staring back at me in the mirror. I knew something had to change so I decided to see a therapist. It was that day on a lumpy orange couch that I finally laid what had happened to me on someone else’s shoulders. I wish I could say I felt relieved and part of me healed, but I didn’t. I was distraught. Afraid of letting my perfect façade slip- I only stayed for a few appointments before abandoning her office. By this time, I had transferred schools but was struggling to stay focused on the start of my senior year. Early that semester I decided to take a leave of absence from school and spend time in Florida at my mom’s new home to heal both my broken heart and spirit. I’m not sure if it was the crystal sand coasts or the balmy sunshine that thawed the walls around my heart, but I began to devour spiritual self-help books, became vegan, and started seeing a therapist for the long haul. In one of my spiritual reads, I stumbled upon a practice called yoni steaming. Immediately I thought, “What is a yoni?” and “Why are we steaming it?”. This was truly one of my defining moments along the journey back to my spirit. Yoni steaming came into my life in late 2015/early 2016. For those who do not know, yoni steaming, or vaginal steaming is the ancient practice of preparing water and herbs to then sit over so the medicinal steam can travel upwards. The herbs are tailored to your specific needs, and this can be done safely at home or with the help of a practitioner. The medicinal steam permeates the tissues of the vulva and vagina providing an abundance of healing- both physical and energetic. Yoni steaming provided me with an avenue to come home to myself, my heart, my center, and my yoni. During my practice, I was given the opportunity to erase the shame, soften my emotional scars, lay down the disgust & self-loathing, navigate self-love, and redefine what pleasure was for me. For the first time in a long time, I started to see myself differently. I looked in the mirror and was proud of the woman I saw looking back at me. Even on the hard days, navigating uncharted waters, I knew that the woman I was meant to become was beginning to finally find her footing. This process didn’t happen overnight. In fact, it took years before I felt like I could take a leap of faith and truly step outside of the “good girl” and “people pleaser” boxes I had been put in for so long. But when I did- man did my life change. I finally told my family about that defining freshman year. I began a new endeavor by sharing my knowledge online and within my community. I obtained my certification in yoni steaming as a peristeam facilitator. The more I shared, the more empowered I became. The more women I helped, the more aligned I felt with my purpose. Through yoni steaming, I found my way back to myself. Once I awakened and listened to my own ancient wisdom- I remembered what I was capable of. I was able to fully allow my divine feminine energy to guide me on my spiritual path as she was always meant to. I was able to heal generational womb wounding, previous trauma, stuck stagnant energy, painful periods, and chaotic energy that had been trapped in my sacred portal. Instead of looking to the external world and to others for answers and approval, I began to look within. I now acknowledge the beautiful dynamic woman I am. I work in tune with my body and listen to the magic she conveys. I embrace pleasure once more and aim to lead a life full of blissful moments both simple and orgasmic. I recognize that I am whole no matter what has happened in my past. I am a woman reclaimed- having risen from her own ashes. This is always how my journey was meant to be I just needed to listen to the goddess inside of me.